You have this one life. How do you wanna spend it? Apologizing? Regretting? Questioning? Hating yourself? Dieting? Running after people who don’t see you? Be brave. Believe in yourself. Do what feels good. Take risks. You have this one life. Make yourself proud.

In which a book besides Harry Potter changed my life

I absolutely hate flying. The feeling when the plane leaves the ground makes my palms all sweaty and every time there’s turbulence I imagine us plummeting to our deaths. I’ve been flying for as long as I can remember so you think I’d get used to it, but that feeling in my gut has never disappeared since I was 3. One of the few reasons I actually enjoy flying is that it’s the only time I can read an entire book uninterrupted, thanks to planes still existing in the stone age and not providing outlets or free wi-fi.

For the flight home to LA today, I decided to read Tina Fey’s pseudo-autobiography Bossypants. It was a tiny paperback that cost only $9 in the airport. I had made attempts to read adult nonfiction before and found it incredibly tedious so I was a little skeptical but I had faith in someone who played an integral role in writing for two onscreen entities very close to my heart: Mean Girls and Saturday Night Live.

Needless to say, the book was incredible. With its commentary on coming-of-age, feminism, and working in entertainment, nothing could have been more relevant in my life right now. At times, it felt like Tina was sitting down next to me on this cramped shitty Southwest plane and having a conversation pertaining directly to me. This is the one and only book I’ve ever read where I actually wanted to mark down quotes so I could remember them (which unfortunately I didn’t because I didn’t have a highlighter or post-its and was still way too repulsed by the thought thanks to AP English).

It just felt like all the feelings and thoughts I’ve been having lately about self-worth and confidence and not giving a fuck were all completely reaffirmed by one of the must successful, inspiring women today. Tina Fey was able to tap into something so utterly human that I feel like very very few people are capable of relaying in such an accurate, eloquent, and goddam funny way. Whether you’re a man or woman, young adult or old adult, everyone needs to read this book and listen to what it says.

Also, this makes me want to go out and read every pseudo-autobiography written by a comedian now.

I no longer have patience for certain things, not because I’ve become arrogant, but simply because I reached a point in my life where I do not want to waste more time with what displeases me or hurts me. I have no patience for cynicism, excessive criticism and demands of any nature. I lost the will to please those who do not like me, to love those who do not love me and to smile at those who do not want to smile at me. I no longer spend a single minute on those who lie or want to manipulate. I decided not to coexist anymore with pretense, hypocrisy, dishonesty and cheap praise. I do not tolerate selective erudition nor academic arrogance. I do not adjust either to popular gossiping. I hate conflict and comparisons. I believe in a world of opposites and that’s why I avoid people with rigid and inflexible personalities. In friendship I dislike the lack of loyalty and betrayal. I do not get along with those who do not know how to give a compliment or a word of encouragement. Exaggerations bore me and I have difficulty accepting those who do not like animals. And on top of everything I have no patience for anyone who does not deserve my patience.

I feel like I just sorta woke up after this weekend and realized that everything is really going to be okay and that this is the probably the most confident I’ve ever felt about myself and it’s feels pretty awesome.